Willkommen in Polska: Personal Space and Lines

In 5 days, we'll be celebrating our 6-monthiversary here in Poland. There aren't nearly as many culture shocks as we had in Jakarta, but there are still a few things that take some getting used to. One of these things is personal space.

As an American, personal space is VERY important to me. I have strict cultural rules concerning personal space. This cultural programming is especially acute when in certain situations, such as at a doctor's office or the check-out line at a grocery store.

Here in Poland, there seems to be a different expectation when it comes to personal space in lines. A few weeks back, I went to the doctor's office to renew a prescription. I was standing at the reception counter talking to the receptionist, when someone else came into the office. While I was still talking, the person came up and stood next to me. I still don't know enough Polish to speak my mind, but I was incredibly flustered at the situation. I didn't feel it was the business of a complete stranger to know what I was doing at the doctor's office.

This could have been written off as a one-time experience, but I've also had issues at the grocery store. I'll admit, there isn't a large amount of space between the aisles and the check-out, but when a complete stranger bumps me in my rear end not once, not twice, but three times, I get kind of frustrated. Actually, very frustrated. After the third time, I didn't care about speaking Polish, I just turned and exclaimed, "Stop touching me!" (I may have included an expletive as well).

Even today at the post office I had an issue. When I entered, the two open windows were already occupied, so I stood several feet away in the middle of the two windows. When one window became free, I approached the counter. During my time at the counter, a line formed behind me. Well, not behind me so much as next to me. Right at my shoulder and old lady was inching closer and closer to make sure she was served next.

I honestly have no idea why Poles are generally more comfortable with less personal space, but I'm not the only one to notice it. And although there are things I can easily get used to, such as shaking hands every time I come across someone I know, personal space is something I value dearly. So, please, if you're a stranger, just don't touch me.

Jacque in Jakarta: The Last Month

One month from today, Alexander and I will be finishing our year-long contract here in Jakarta. The original plan was to renew for another year. We planned to live in Jakarta for one more year. We planned to dodge motorbikes, breathe in pollution and circumnavigate holes in the sidewalks for one more year. We planned to spend more time with our friends, have dinner out a few times a week and get massages for under five dollars for one more year.

That was our plan. But life isn't something you can always plan.

After much thought, long talks and a lot of prayer, Alexander and I decided we need to be closer to our families. This doesn't mean we'll be living in anyone's backyard. But there's a big difference between a 9-hour flight and a 24-hour flight. There's also the complication of exit visas here in Indonesia, which don't exist in Europe.

So we've decided to return to Europe, Poland to be exact. This wasn't a decision left to chance. Over the course of a week, we sent out about thirty applications around the world. By around the world, I mean: Indonesia, China, Taiwan, Thailand, Turkey, Ukraine, Poland, Germany, France, Spain and Morocco. Out of all those positions in all those countries, there was only one school that offered an acceptable package for both of us: Poland.

It will be a bit of a culture shock for us to go from a city of over 17 million people to a town of around 10,000. We also aren't completely prepared to go from temperatures of 40°C (104°F) to 25°C (77°F). It will additionally take some getting used to going from Indonesian Rupiah to Polish Zloty. But I think we're ready for the change, and it's a decision that is best for us at this time.

In the meantime, we still have a month left in Jakarta. I don't want to get upset about leaving my friends, but instead I want to enjoy the time we have left together. It's not "goodbye", Jakarta, it's "see you later".

Jacque in Jakarta: 10 signs you're an Expat in Jakarta

After nearly a year of living in Jakarta, I've started to become acclimated with parts of the culture I originally took issue with. Here's a list of ten things that any expat in Jakarta can relate to (and may be a sign you've lived here too long). In no particular order:

1. You think outside your front door is the appropriate place to store shoes

The shoe gallery down the hall

When we first arrived to Jakarta, we were surprised to see a shoe store outside our neighbors' apartments and vowed we would never leave our shoes outside of our apartment. Fast forward ten months and you will find the bulk of our shoes outside our front door. At first we may have had a fear of theft, but then we realized that nobody is going to steal a pair of Payless shoes.

2. You have Batik for every day of the week

A glimpse of our Batik collection

Batik is the traditional clothing from Indonesia. Each region has its own distinct design of Batik. Normally on Fridays, people are allowed to wear Batik to their workplace. When we first arrived, we were entirely Batik-less, but over time we have purchased Batik and received Batik as gifts from Indonesian friends. Now, we can wear Batik just about every day of the week in order to feel like a 'local'.

3. You own a pair of knock-off Crocs

Flooding is common in Jakarta during rainy season, and even in dry season there can be monsoon storms. Therefore, Crocs are quite useful since they dry quickly and have a firm grip on wet surfaces. I held out for a long time, but finally found my pair of purple crocs for a bargain price of 50,000 IDR ($5.00).

4. 'Banjir', 'macet' and 'demo' are part of your active vocabulary

That string of lights is all cars

Free swimming pool!

Upon arrival to Jakarta, even if you don't speak a word of Indonesian, you will quickly learn that 'banjir' means flood, 'macet' means traffic jam and 'demo' means protest. When Indonesians have asked me about my experience in Jakarta, I usually respond with these three words and they laugh, knowingly.

5. When you see a white person, your first thought is, "Bule!"

The only Bules in the village

In our first week of living in Jakarta, I lost track of how many times someone shouted "Bule!" 'Bule' (Boo-lay) is a term for white Westerners. Generally, it is not meant as an insult, but it can be challenging to our Western sensibilities of racism. After so much time here, I get excited when I see other white people and inadvertently say, "Oh, look! It's a Bule!"

6. You spend at least one day a week at a mall

One of the many Jakartan shopping destinations

Something we learned quickly is the cost of land here is so exuberant that restaurants, clothing stores and most other stores have to set up shop in a mall. It is difficult to find free-standing restaurants or shops, so most weekends or free days are spent in a mall. As a friend of mine said, Jakarta is the city of a hundred malls, so you can really find anything and everything you need in a Jakarta mall.

7. You've been hit/nearly hit by a motorbike at least once

Walking to work or the store is always an adventurous experience. As I've mentioned in previous posts, the sidewalks leave much to be desired, and motorbikes don't seem to understand the concept of pedestrians on sidewalks or one-way streets being one-way. If nothing else, I have learned to ALWAYS look both ways in Jakarta, even if you THINK you're on a one-way street.

8. You have at least one epic story of a horrible taxi driver

The "reliable" taxi company

Countless times we've had taxi drivers racially profile us as being rich and so they have taken advantage of us in numerous ways. Sometimes they offer to take us on a toll road that is 30 minutes out of the way. Other times they'll take a 'short cut' that extends our ride considerably. My favorite story is when the taxi driver insisted that there would be more traffic because of the Lebaron holiday (The holiday in which Jakarta is practically empty). The best advice I could give to newbies is to have a map and insist on the route you know. After a while you can explain in Indonesian, "Saya tidak bodoh".

9. You consider four people on a motorbike to be normal

A regular family vehicle

The first time I saw five people on a motorbike, my jaw dropped. Now, I consider a motorbike to be a family vehicle, suitable for the same number of people as can fit in a sedan.

10. Your diet contains more 'nasi' than bread

I have always enjoyed eating rice, which I consider a bonus for coming to Indonesia. The first time we bought a 5kg bag of rice, I thought it would last us the rest of the year. A month later I was worried that I didn't have enough rice for dinner.

There are many other signs to be shared, but these have been my main experiences. For those of you in the same situation, I hope you've enjoyed the post. For those of you who don't get it, just come to Jakarta for a few months.

Jacque in Jakarta: The Joke about Summer

About a week ago, I heard on the news that it was the first day of summer. For the first 23 summers of my life, this actually meant something. It meant that there would be very little rain and lots of daylight. It meant I wouldn't need a jacket when I went outside and I could definitely wear my summer dresses. It meant that it was officially summer, spring showers were supposed to be over. Then last year, I was in England for summer. More specifically, I was in England for the rainiest summer of the past hundred years. There were a few sunny days, but it was mostly rainy, cold and dreary. Many days I sat by the fire to warm up.

And now this year I'm in Jakarta. Talking about summer is a bit of a joke here. In fact, talking about any season is kind of a joke. There are supposed to be two seasons here: Dry and wet. However, very little change occurs between these two seasons. The temperature stays relatively the same, with only a slight variance between hot when it's raining and very hot when it's not raining. We are supposed to be in the dry season now, but the seven-day forecast shows rain almost everyday.

I used to really love the summer heat, but now I long for the crisp, clean smell of autumn, the sharp, piercing cold of winter, and the cool, refreshing mornings of spring. Without a change in season, it's hard to appreciate the sunny summer days. I will be visiting the U.S. in September, and among many other things I look forward to the end of this ceaseless summer. I look forward to a change of scene and season. I look forward to the chill of my home.

Jacque in Jakarta: Cultural Pollution

Eight months ago yesterday, we landed in Jakarta. The only other place I had visited in Southeast Asia was Singapore, which is nothing like Jakarta. In Singapore, there is hardly any pollution and people are actually fined for littering. In Jakarta, we wear a mask because of the pollution and witness people throwing trash on the ground everyday.

Jakarta is home to one of the most polluted rivers in the world, Citarum (pronounced "Chi-ta-room"). People who used to fish for fish are now forced to fish for plastic because all the fish have died. There has been a push to clean-up Citarum, but simply clearing the debris is not going to address the root of the problem. In order to solve the issue of pollution, the mindset of the people must be changed.

During my first week in Jakarta, I was astonished to see a taxi driver roll down his window and throw a plastic wrapper out his window. I was surprised to see an elderly woman throw her trash on the floor of an angkot. I was disappointed to see children throwing emply soda bottles onto the road. As long as these occurances are deemed normal, there will not be a solution to the ever-increasing problem of pollution.

It might not be popular to voice this opinion, but the people of Jakarta have to open their eyes and see they are destroying themselves. The people have to realize that constantly littering leads to the numerous, damaging, sometimes deadly, floods. If Indonesia wants to participate on a world scale, then they have to make progress concerning their outlook on pollution. Just because your grandmother did it, doesn't mean it is right. Come into the twenty-first century, Jakarta. Stand up for your city, tell people to stop littering now. Stop littering before more lives are needlessly lost.

Jacque in Jakarta: Pollution and Political Correctness

Since I haven't written in nearly a month, I decided I would catch up by giving a double dose of insights.

After the floods last month, we had an interesting point of view from our apartment. Once the water had finally receded, it left the river looking like this:

Yes, that pile of trash is actually the river. The heavy rains pushed all of the litter into the river, and the river carried it to this bridge. The next logical question is, 'Where did all the litter come from?'

The answer is that here in Jakarta, people have a different idea about littering. In the West, we are given fines if we throw trash on the ground, and even if we're not caught, the people around us think we are slobs. Here in Jakarta, there doesn't seem to be fines for littering and, in general, it seems to be a natural way of life. I've seen children throwing candy wrappers on the sidewalks, taxi drivers throwing bottles out of their windows and even an elderly women of about 70 throwing her used tissue on the floor of the angkot.

My students seem to realize that this isn't healthy for their environment, but when asked about it they simply accept defeat. They complain about people littering, but say nothing about it. It's as if they have accepted that this is the way it is, and therefore it's the way it always will be. Speaking of 'the way it is' leads me to my next topic.

In the West, it is generally understood that you never ask a person, especially a lady, the person's age. Additionally, marital status is something you find out from general conversation as opposed to flat out asking if someone is married. In Jakarta, the first question people ask upon meeting you is your age. The second question is about your marital status. If you are not married, they ask why you're not married. If you are married, they ask how many children you have. If you are married and don't have children, they ask why you don't have children.

Here, it seems to be understood that people, especially women, get married in their early twenties and start having babies in their first year of marriage. If you are single or childless, there's something wrong with you. This Western idea of having a career before thinking about marriage or saving money to have children seems to be lost here.

Whether or not I agree is another matter. It is simply a different way of thinking, and I suppose as long as I am a Jakartan resident I have to accept 'the way it is'. But no worries to my Western friends and family. I won't be practicing littering and I don't intend to pick up the habit of asking taboo questions any time soon.

Jacque in Jakarta: "Hei bule, bule, bule! How are you?"

After living in Jakarta for over a month, I've been able to notice some quirks of the locals. I've mentioned the cramming culture before, which is one quirk that I'm slowly getting used to. However, the thing that really drives me crazy is being called "bule" by a complete stranger.

Walking down the street, random people will quite often call out to me or Alexander and say, "Hei Mister/Hei Missus!", which is something I'm quite used to ignoring. The world over I've had to ignore unwanted advances of strangers. But more often then Mister/Missus we'll hear "bule". Generally, it is said more than just once. It kind of reminds me of a pig call, except they say, "bule, bule, bule".

"Bule" is not meant to be a derogatory term, it simply means Westerner/White person. It is not meant to be an insult, attack, or even rude. The most hilarious part is that they usually try to speak English to us after having called out "bule". The only problem is that we see it as rude, whether it is meant to be or not.

In Spain, I would joke about being a guiri, or gringa, and even here we say we're bules among friends. But if someone screamed guiri at me in the middle of Sevilla, I would understandably be irritated. It's kind of like telling someone who's disabled that he/she can't walk. Stating the obvious is never very polite. So even if they're just trying to be friendly, that's not the way to make a good impression with a stranger.

Alexander has taken to responding with, "Indonesian, Indonesian, Indonesian" everytime we're called bule. At first I was embarrassed that he did this, but then I realized a taste of their own medicine might be just what the doctor ordered. We may even achieve a cultural awarenes that bules don't like to be yelled at in public. Then again, Alexander might just give bules a reputation for being crazy.

Jacque in Jakarta: The appliances in my apartment

 It's been nearly a month since Alex and I arrived in Jakarta. We're slowly getting through our shock and sliding into the initial adjustment of our culture shock. One of the things that is taking us a while to adjust to is our appliances.

I've grown accustomed to not having a tumble dryer whenever I go abroad. Most places I've lived outside of the U.S. are much more environmentally conscious and therefore don't want to waste the energy that a tumble dryer uses. However, I've always had the luxury of a washing machine that is hooked into the plumbing. Here, it's a bit different.

In order to use the washing machine correctly, there are two hoses that need to be used. The green hose is for the ingoing water, and the white hose is for the outgoing water. The green hose is attatched to the bathroom faucet on one end and the back of the machine on the other. The white hose is attached to the bottom of the machine where the waste water is dispelled on one end, and on the other end it is in the shower drain. The tricky part is using the machine without having water go all over the place.

The first step is to correctly attatch the hoses. One time the white hose wasn't firmly attatched to the bottom of the machine and the waste water went all over our apartment. The next step is to turn on the water to fill the machine through the green hose. If the water isn't turned off on time, the pressure of the water causes the hose to fly off the machine and then water goes everywhere. The water from the green hose is used to fill the machine and then used to rinse the clothes, so it's used twice. Lastly, there is a pot under the green hose because it usually leaks. The first time we did laundry, we didn't realize it would leak and, once again, water went everywhere.

Not only is the washing machine a bit wonky, our air conditioner usually leaks if it's been on too long. So, when we go to bed we turn it on and as soon as we wake up we usually have to turn it off so it won't leak. Also, there is no hot water, so we've been taking cold showers for a month.

However, I can't complain too much. Next week we'll be moving to a new apartment with hot water and an a/c in the living room. Also, I should be happy to at least have a washing machine and running water. Afterall,  I'd hate to be accused of suffering from FWP.