Willkommen in Polska: Driving Myself Crazy

The last time I got my driver's license renewed was on January 15, 2010. I was living in Arkansas, so I got my license there. Within eight months, I had moved to Germany to work for a year, after that I moved to Washington, DC to work for a year, then I move to England, where I got married, and then I moved to Jakarta, Indonesia for a year. All that adds up to three years, eight months and a name change. Since Arkansas licenses expire every four years, I needed to return to Arkansas to renew my license and change my name...but I didn't.

When I looked into renewal, the information I found stated that only military personnel could renew their licenses by mail. I have since discovered that is not entirely accurate, but I decided that I should just get a Polish license since I am now living in Poland. I figured it would be a simple exchange of my American license for a Polish one. However, there was nothing simple about the process of getting a Polish license.

The process started about a month before my license was due to expire. We went to the local version of the DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles) and asked about how to renew. I had to fill out a two-page form, turn in a copy of my driver's license, Polish residence card and a picture showing my right ear (no idea why they don't do biometric photos here). It seemed to be straight-forward enough and I expected my new license in two weeks.

A few days later, we received a call that an American driver's license can't be transferred so easily. The U.S. is not one of the 67 contracting parties of the U.N.'s Vienna Convention on Road Traffic, which was put in place to make road traffic safer and more uniform. In layman's terms, Americans don't know how to properly drive in a country outside of their own (some would argue Americans don't know how to drive, period). What did all this mean for me? It meant I had to take a theory test here in Poland.

There are many steps involved before you can take your test here. First, I had to get a physical done. Of course there was an eye test, but they also checked my blood pressure, blood sugar and medical history. I was asked about diseases, drinking, smoking and other things that my translator struggled with. Then, I had to take the form I got from the physical to my local DMV. Two days later, I received a number. I had to take that number to Gorzow, which is about 45 minutes away, in order to book an appointment for my test. While there, we found out that I needed an official translator for my test, even though it would be in English. So I had to book a translator for the test as well. Finally, I had to order materials to study for the test.

When the materials arrived, I was honestly shocked to find a 110 page booklet +DVD-Rom that had 1290 practice questions. This is not an exaggeration. There were 1290 questions. I answered all of them. And I read the book. Twice. I did all this over the course of 10 days. I was ready for my test.

The test consist of 32 questions. Twenty questions are yes/no and twelve are multiple choice. You are given 25 minutes to complete the test and you have a set amount of time for each question. The questions range from 1-3 points and the total amount of points is 74. You are required to get 68 points. This averages to about a 92%. When I took the test, I got a 91%. I failed by ONE point.

This meant that I had to take the test for a second time. I had to pay for a second test, and I had to pay for the translator to come back. By the way, the translation I needed was basically, "This is a driving test. The rules are on your computer. Good luck." So after a weekend of moping, I went back for the second test 3 days later.

When I showed my passport, the test proctor noticed I was from Arkansas and Bill Clinton was mentioned. Many other test-takers requested a different computer number from the one they had previously failed on. In the exam just before mine, everyone failed. It is a very difficult test. So, once the test started, I read every question two or three times. One of the questions was even a repeat of a question I had missed on my first test. My result on the second test was positive. I received a 70/74.

In the coming week I should receive my Polish driving license. Between that and my marriage certificate, it seems I'm slowly becoming more Polish and less American. I must say that I am happy to receive a license which will be recognized in 67 countries. However, with hindsight I would advise other Americans to just go home for a renewal!

Willkommen in Polska: Bureaucracy

As a non-EU citizen coming into the EU, things can be pretty tricky. Since I'm married to an EU-citizen, things are a bit easier, but, nevertheless, still incredibly complicated. This post is meant to be a bit of a warning for any other couples about to enter the process of EU bureaucracy. Keep in mind that it is different in each EU country, which is a large part of the issue.

Once Alexander was registered here in Poland, it was my turn to go through registration. We had to fill out a 4-page form in Polish (luckily with the help of our boss) which included information about my parents, my physical characteristics, my residence, my citizenship and various other tidbits. I had to take 5 passport size photos which showed my left ear and we had to turn in copies of my passport, Alexander's passport, Alexander's work contract, Alexander's registration documents and our marriage certificate. Things went smoothly with all but two things.

Firstly, the people at the regional registration office were pretty clueless about how to deal with a non-EU citizen wanting to register. It's not something that happens often in this area, and I'm guessing it would have been much smoother in Warsaw. The second issue was with our marriage certificate. According to EU law, there should be no problems if documentation is in English. Apparently, we've researched more about EU law than the people at the office have, so they wanted it in Polish. The other problem with the marriage certificate was the validity. They explained that since it was dated July 14, 2012 (the date of our marriage), there was no way to confirm we were still married. They needed confirmation that we were STILL married. Yeah...

We were able to go to the next step without proving our marriage (I was contemplating staging a make-out protest), although it took borderline hysterics on my part. We then had to register me in our local town, Kostrzyn, where we live. Once again, there was a problem with the marriage certificate. This time, they insisted we translate it to Polish. So, we went to a local translation place and went back to the office to get registered. Everything was in order, I got registered locally and received the necessary documentation to officially register with Warsaw, and before leaving the office we asked for our marriage certificate. The answer was they keep our marriage certificate. THEY keep OUR marriage certificate...

This time it was full-blown hysterics, which did nobody any good. In exchange for our British marriage certificate, we were given a Polish one. A Polish marriage certificate for two people who aren't Polish, don't speak Polish, and weren't married in Poland. My honeymoon bubble had official burst at this point. On the bright side, we were informed that if we got an official copy from the UK, then they would give us back our original copy...but I still find the whole process utterly ridiculous.

In the end, I am officially registered in Kostrzyn and awaiting my Polish residence card from Warsaw, which should be arriving in the next couple of weeks. In the meantime, I'm hoping to learn enough Polish to understand what my marriage certificate says.

Willkommen in Polska: The Honeymoon

Our first morning in Kostrzyn, I looked out our window and smiled. We have a beautiful tree full of autumnal colors. I told Alexander I was so excited because I would actually get to have a honeymoon phase, which didn't happen in Jakarta.

View from our window

We arrived on a Thursday and started the official paperwork for Alex on the Friday, so we got to drive through the beautiful forests of the region we're now living in. On the Saturday, we were able to get things to cook on our stove with and bake in our oven with. It was fantastic to be able to cook a proper meal with a four-burner stove top. On the Sunday, we went with our boss to his family church and met a lot of his family, and on the Monday, we started work.

On the walk to work

We walked 3.5 kilometers to work and about one kilometer of the walk was through a forest. The students here are about the same as students anywhere else. As with most foreign language learners, they tend to revert to their native language. The first week I was able to teach English, German and Spanish to students from the age of  6 to 50+, so it hasn't been boring. It's been especially exciting to be able to use the languages that I studied and got my degree in.

One of the first things I noticed about Kostrzyn was the deutsch. Due to its closeness to Germany, Kostrzyn has German on so many signs and several people here kann ein bisschen deutsch, which has made things a little smoother when it comes to transitioning here.

The first week in Kostrzyn was truly awesome. It was great to breath fresh air, and be surrounded by fall colors, and hear leaves crunching under my feet and raining onto the rooftops. However, in our second week we started to deal with a lot of bureaucracy, such as registering me, a non-EU citizen, to live in Poland. All the bureaucracy meant my honeymoon phase was quickly over...but it was great when it lasted.